I came home to bad news

I'm back from my trip, had a good time, but I don't feel like talking about it since it isn't important to me anymore.

I returned home to an email informing me that Gelli's (my good friend) sister had passed away. Her sister Daisy was about 2 years older than me and she died of Cancer over the weekend. Getting this news sent a shock in my body and felt it drained me of will and energy.
I attended the wake and the funeral the last two days and I cant believe she is gone. Come on she was only 2 years older than me!?!?!?!? I sat in the pew at the church service thinking of all the things I want to accomplish in my life and have not done, life is short and I don't want to go away not living life to my fullest.

I love Gelli so much and seeing her cry I just wanted to scoop her up and cradle her like a baby, I wanted to make the pain go away, I wanted to be the superhero that would make everything better, but I couldn't, all I could do was hug her.

Since my dad passed away I have become antifunerals. I wish not to see the coffin, and wish to stay as far away from everyone at church. I do this because it brings back the pain I suffered when my papi passed away and I hate remembering those sad feelings. Eventhough I say I'm antifunerals, I still go to them out of respect to the person and the family.